It's faith....

Sometimes I think...

Sometimes I wonder....

What's the point being a good girl n all?

In the end...

Ppl would not believe in you...

They misjudge you...


They accuse n blame u on something without even bother telling you wat it is...or try to listen nor get any explanation from you....

They immediately judge you from wat they see...

But not from the person itself...


Its hurts alot when you know u are innocent but people is still madly accusing you...blaming you on something which you never ever did...

It even hurts when you know it was the closet person around you that accused you...

Blame you...

Don't believe in you...


Friends...

Family...

Lovers..

EVERYONE....


Perhaps this is my faith...

Perhaps this the karma I get from my past life...

It's my destiny to be accused and blamed by people...

By the people you once loved n trust...


It's not the first time things like tat happen to me...

Since young....

I was accused n blamed ALWAYS...

The pain..

The suffer I had all these long...

No one will ever know...

No one will ever understand...


Just imagine...

Somebody accuse you on something you didn't even do and u have to FORCE yourself to admit it just for the sake of stopping all the scolding n more misunderstanding ?!!

Have you?

I faced such problems since I was like 9?

I will never forget those moments I was blamed n accused....

The pain...

The wound...

Had turn to a big scar deep down in my heart....


Why....??

Why I have to get such punishment...?

Why people have to treat me like this...?

Why accused...?

Why blame...?

Or this is a sign to let me know that I shouldn't be a good girl after all...??


Perhaps I should start blaming n accuse someone too..?

Or perhaps I'll just be a bad girl and let everyone say about it...?

Blame n accuse me about everything...

At least it's true...

They doesn't want to listen or get any explanation from you after all....


Sad?

Yes...


Pain?

Yes...


Disappointment?

Yes....


What to do..?

Perhaps it's really my faith to be accused n blamed my whole life...


Like always...

I can do nothing....

Nobody cares after all...


The pain n suffer of being blamed n accused...

Had become part of my living...

Part of my life...

当他不爱你的时候，请选择放弃。

因为你无法得到他，放弃就让回忆得到了他。爱上一个不爱自己 的人会很累。或许你不知道，被一个自己不爱的人爱着也会很累。因为你的爱对他而言是一种负担。你的爱，是火焰，他不敢拥抱。你的爱，会让他恐慌，让他逃 避。所以你应该站在对方的立场来思考对方的感受。

放开他吧，勉强来的爱是不会幸福的。让他自由快乐的同时，也要让自己自由。尽管不快乐。让他幸福地微笑。让自己微笑着流泪。

拿得起放得下

有着太多的“ 执着”，岂是说放下就能放得下的！
如果一个人真能够做到“拿得起，放得下”， ...
就称得上是幸福的人生了。
能不能很快调整好自己的心态？
任何东西只要能拿得起,就可以放得下!
错了！
除了感情以外，其它东西都可以拿得起放得下 ...
左思右想, 舍不得放不下眼前自己所拥有的一切？
带着你眼前所拥有的一切去受苦吧！

How i wish...

How I wish I was not that lonely...

How I wish if I'm given more attention...

How I wish to be that happy girl again......

How I wish......

我对你，只有放弃，没有忘记。我唯一没有做好的事，就是说了"我愛你"。

我把爱给了不该爱上的他
最后留下伤痛给了我自己
还记得当初是我说过的，我只是喜欢他而已。
可是如今这而已却已变味。
是爱吗?我不想知道。
我不想爱上他，因为这只会让一切变的更危险。
希望我不曾遇见他。
也许我们就是有缘无分，
才会擦肩而过。
累了，我真的累了……
可能是注定的。
所以我要把他从我的世界里搬出来了。
很想说：为什么我一直看到你！

I miss the smile, I miss the laughter, I miss who he used to be....

He has no idea what goes on through
 her mind.

She's so good at pretending and 
he will never know how many tears are 
fallen each night for him.

Nor the endless 
hours that she wastes thinking maybe....

Just maybe....

Sometimes I wished you really know how I feel deep inside.....

Good girl gone bad ?

I've been trying so hard to get away from this world....

From the world of reality...


Have u heard of ''The higher u climb the harder u fall '' ?


Yes...

Things like that always happen to me...

I have no idea how many times I cried...

How many times I broke down all this long....

The pain inside is killing me deeply...


I thought I was weak...

But I was wrong...

All these problems I had...

Made me grow stronger...


I used to cry before I sleep...

I used to cry in my dreams....

I used to cry when I'm awake...


Tears....

They represent thousand of words...

They represent...

Sadness...

Anger...

Disappointment....


I learn not to cry often....

I learn not to put so much hope on something or someone...

I learn to stand on my feet whenever I fall...


I was on MSN the other day...

Chatting with one of my old friend...

Dint met her for 3 yrs now...


I was stunned when I chat with her...

Guess what?

She's totally different...


She told me she read my blog...

She encourage me to be bad...

Encourage me to try smoking...

Encourage me to be a playgirl...

Encourage me to ' USE ' guys...


I was shocked....

She's not like that before....

She used to be a good girl..


I remember her telling me how much she hate ppl smoking...

I remember her telling me how much she hate those playgirls....

I remember how she used to hate and gossip about those playgirls who simply just kiss, having one nigh stand , n playing with guys feelings....

But now...

She have become one of them....


I don't hate her...

Seriously I don't....

She's still my friend...


I know why she would end up like this...

I couldn't blame her...

She really had a hard time...


Her family breaks apart...

She caught her boyfriend cheating on her....

She run away from home n live with her friends...


Now she's a hard smoker...

She couldn't live without smoking...

Cigarettes its like a tranquillizer to her...

She have to smoke at least 12 sticks of cigarette a day...

To calm her down n stuff....


She used guys...

For her transportation...

And for money spending...


I know it's the scar...

The deep heartbreaks...

The sadness she had turns her like tat....


She might sounds strong or looks strong...

but I know deep inside...

She's not...

The fragile heart she born with...

It's always there inside...


She do admit that she's different n bad now...

but she have no regrets on wat she have done to herself..

She told me she was happy with her life..


Imagine if one day I'm like her...

Would I end up happy too?


After I blog about me planning to be a bad girl...

They are quite lots of ppl suggested me trying to be bad...

Which kinda shocked me tho...

They're like....

'U too guai lui ady la... try to be bad n see how it feels la..perhaps u'll like it...'

Of course they are people who told me not to be so stupid to go ahead n 'destroy' myself too... I should love myself n be proud of myself....


But seriously....

Because I'm a good girl and all....

They are real life ppl out there who really used me...

betray me...

lie to me...

take advantage of me..

accuse me....


I loose hope on friends, love n family...


I'm really tired of getting sad....

Getting heartbreaks...

Getting pissed...

I cant take this pain anymore...


Whether I'm turning bad or not...

I know they are no guarantees that I might feel better or happy....

No one can see the future...

No one can predict wat's gonna happen....


I don't wan to turn bad too...

It isn't my thing at all....

I wan to continue being a good girl as I promised...


All I need it's just love, care n support...

I really just wanna be happy....

Lolìpop

Love me forever!

Remember me always!

Dream

Princess...

Red apple

玲玲

Yeah

Lingling 17.10.2009

可爱的娃娃!yes!

Yeah..

这样子应该有可爱点了吧?